What Does Earning the Father's Love Do to You?

Scripture:

When the boys grew up, Esau was a skillful hunter, a man of the field, while Jacob was a quiet man, dwelling in tents. Isaac loved Esau because he ate of his game, but Rebekah loved Jacob. Genesis 25:27,28

Observation:    I wonder how much of the trajectory of Jacob’s life was affected by the fact that is dad preferred his brother over him?  That his father’s love seemed to be conditional on what Jacob did and not on who he was.  The text does not say, “And Isaac loved Jacob because he was his son.”  The rest of Jacob’s life seems to be a series of attempts to earn or steal, starting with the theft of his father’s blessing.  It is like Jacob is chasing the approval he never received, and has decided it is up to him and his own efforts to get it.

David Benner, in his book, Surrender to Love, asks, “Imagine God thinking about you.  What do you assume God feels when you come to mind?”  For most people, it is an expression of disappointment, disgust, or anger.  Benner says that people with this image of God will respond with “an effort to earn his approval.” 

Application:    Do my kids each feel in their gut that I love them, no matter what they do or love?  I have 4 kids with 4 different tastes.  Some very different from mine.  I do not want them to feel their worth in my eyes is related to them being a man of the field, or eating of their game.  I need to take time tonight to share with each child my love for them.  I’m going to tell each of them I love them tonight.

Prayer: God, may I always be quick to love my kids, no matter their tastes or personality.  May they be secure in my love, and secure in Yours.

A Healthy Sense of Shame

Scripture:         When Noah awoke from his wine and knew what his youngest son had done to him, he said, “Cursed be Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be to his brothers.” Genesis 9:24-25

Observation:    Noah has too much to drink and passes out naked in his tent.  His son, Ham (father of Canaan), sees him and ridicules him.  From one act, Ham and his entire lineage is cursed.  What was the big deal?  

            There are many parallels between this act and the fall.  Both incidents involved food—the fruit of the tree and the fruit of the vine.  Both of these involved nakedness.  Both of these resulted in a curse.  Back in Noah’s day, nakedness was a reminder of the fall, a reminder of the shame of separation.  So to be naked or revel in nakedness was a shameful act.

            Noah blew it, not by drinking, but by getting drunk and allowing his sons to see him in shame.  Ham ridicules while Shem and Japheth refuse to engage.  They go out of their way to honor their father, and to reject delight in nakedness.  Shem and Japheth show a sense of shame before God; Ham does not.

            It is not a simple joke that curses Ham.  It is the lack of shame before God that his actions evidence.  His descendants, the Canaanites, would be cursed, ruled over, and defeated by his brothers.  It is no coincidences that nakedness and sexual sin were hallmarks of Canaanite society.  The entire tribe showed a lack of healthy shame before God.

            God blesses those who have a healthy sense of shame.  Jewish Rabbis wrote in the Talmud that one who possessed no proper sense of shame “did not have his feet present at Mount Sinai.”  While shame is often abused and misused today, I tend to agree with these Rabbis.  There is such thing as a healthy sense of shame.  A quick look at our culture shows a society that has been severed from Mount Sinai.

Application:    How do I live out and pass on a healthy sense of shame to my kids?  In our house, we use the words “inappropriate” to describe certain TV shows, music, or movies.  Have I become lax towards shame?  Has soaking in our culture inured me towards shame?    

Prayer:             God, I do not want to be like Ham, reveling in what is shameful.  Help retune my sensitivity today towards sin.  Give me a healthy sense of shame.

When God Was Sorry.

Scripture:  And the Lord regretted that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him to his heart.  So the Lord said, “I will blot out man whom I have created from the face of the land, man and animals and creeping things and birds of the heavens, for I am sorry that I have made them.” Genesis 6:7-8

Observation:    This is a painful thing to hear.  The Lord regretted making us.  We grieved him.  He is sorry.  I have a difficult time reconciling these words with the sovereignty of God.  I mean, God knew when he made us that we would turn out this way.  Heck, he knew before he even created time that one day we would betray him and rebel.  How then could he say words like this, words that sound like a God who is surprised by the actions of his creation.  I don’t think the meaning here is that God changed his mind or made a mistake.  Rather, it seems to be trying to capture his immense sorrow. 

On the one hand, I have no power over God.  I do not hold the power to please him or pain him.  His well being is not dependent on my actions.  On the other hand, it is clear that we humans do affect his heart.  He is not a cold, calculating God, who is indifferent to the lives of his people.  He is a God whose heart aches for the loss of his loved ones, who hurts when we pursue wickedness, who regrets the separation from his children.

Application:    Sometimes as a father, I find myself angry with my kids when they disobey.  But often, that anger is due to the lack of control I seem to have over them.  I am mad they will not obey me.  But the emotion God shows here says to me that God is not mad because he lacks control over us.  He is sorrowful for the pain and evil we bring upon ourselves due to sin.  As I look at my kids’ disobedience, is my heart moved with compassion for how their disobedience can hurt them and separate them from God, or am I just frustrated they won’t do what I say?

Prayer:  God, when my kids disobey, move my heart away from self-focus and anger, and towards a genuine desire to see them walking with you in the truth.  Let my role be corrector, not enforcer of my rule.   Give me a heart like yours.

Not All Who Wander Are Lost (but sometimes they are).

Scripture:         You shall be a fugitive and a wanderer on the earth. Genesis 4:12

Observation:    Cain’s rash act of murder results in a lifetime curse.  Not only will the ground he had tilled so well now turn against him, but he is to be banished.  His parents’ sin resulted in banishment from a place (the garden) and God’s presence.  Cain has taken life and his punishment is permanent alienation from his family and his God.  He has been kicked out of the family. 

At first, his punishment seems light.  Murder results in wandering?  But the more I understand this, the more gruesome it becomes.  Cain is not just going to be a wanderer; he will wander without God.  

There is a bumper sticker in Colorado Springs that says, “All who wander are not lost.”  That may be, but for Cain, he was doomed to wander AND be lost, separated from God.  Was there room for repentance?  Reconciliation?  Sadly, it does not seem so.  Cain’s curse was not the mark.  It was the prospect of life WITHOUT God. 

  

Application:    This year, our church is studying the parables of Jesus, to learn what journeying with God versus without God looks like.  Like Cain, there are thousands of people in our city who are wandering without God.  Unlike Cain, they still have a chance to come to Christ and go with God.  This year, I want to get serious about praying for those I know without God.  This text has reminded me of the terrible curse of living without God.  I want to begin praying for three houses I know on my street where there are people living without God.

Prayer: God, I ask you to give me a heart of prayer for those I know who are wandering without you.  Will you bring them to faith this year?  Will you give me opportunities to love them to you, and share with them the journey home?

Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul.

Scripture:         These all died in faith, not having received the things promised, but having seen them and greeted them from afar, and having acknowledged that they were strangers and exiles on the earth. …And all these, though commended through their faith, did not receive what was promised, since God had provided something better for us, that apart from us they should not be made perfect. Hebrews 11:13, 39-40

Observation:    Hebrews tells us of men and women who held on to hope in the midst of horrendous situations.  Many of these people died never having received, but having seen.  The reason they did not receive is that God had provided something better.

            There is great power in hope.  Emily Dickenson once wrote: “Hope is the thing with feathers/That perches in the soul/And sings the tune--without the words/And never stops at all.”  It is from that perch in our hearts that hope sings the tune of redemption, the song of salvation.  The notes that remind us that this is not our home, that something better for us is out there with Christ.

Application:    This has been a difficult fall season for me, filled with tough conversations and circumstances.  I needed to be reminded today that things I have only seen with the eyes of hope, I will hold with the hands of faith.   Just around the corner of this year, I believe that I will begin to receive things I have only greeted from afar.  I must continue to sing the tune of hope and never stop at all.  God is good and he will do it.

And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears.
And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.
Get over your hill and see what you find there,
With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair. ("After the Storm" Mumford and Sons)

Prayer:             God, give me the song of hope today.  Hope that one day it will all be made right with you.  But also the hope that you are at work and that some of the seeds sown in the last few years will be ready for the harvest in 2012.   I trust you to get me over the hill with grace in my heart and flowers in my hair.

Possess Your Own Vessel.

Scripture: …each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor... 1 Thessalonians 4:4 

Observation: Paul is encouraging the Thessalonians to not fall back into their pre-Jesus ways of living, especially in regards to sexual purity. He encourages them that now, in Christ, they ought to know how to “possess their own vessel.” To demonstrate self-control over their bodies, that their bodies might help them live holy and honorable lives.
   Though the context is primarily the relationship between the body and sex, the larger principle here seems to be that believers ought to control their bodies, and not let their bodies control them. This has application not only in sexuality, but in diet, health, addiction, sleep. The larger principle is that believers ought to control their own bodies.

Application: Nibbling at the edge of my soul these last few months has been the question: What obligations do I have to God with my body, other than sexual purity? I know I am overweight and out of shape. Is that something God cares about? The reason I am in this situation is that I am not controlling my body, but letting my body’s cravings and desires control me. I think that God wants me to control my own body in the area of health, not just purity. I do not know what this means fully yet, only that it has implications for me and our church as well.

Prayer: God, I want to control my own body in holiness and honor. Will you show me what that means and then how I can trust you for the power to do so?

Go to God, and Get Back to Work!

Scripture: Now when Sanballat heard that we were building the wall, he was angry and greatly enraged, and he jeered at the Jews. Nehemiah 4:1 Observation: So much work had been done on the wall Nehemiah was rebuilding. Gates rehung, towers restored, breaches repaired. It was close to half-way finished. Nehemiah and his team were close to carrying out the task of the Lord. And then opposition arises. Sanballat begins to taunt them and accuse them. This does not deter Nehemiah, however, who takes this issue straight to God, and then gets back to work. Goes to God, and gets back to work. There is a wall to be built, after all. In the next few verses we see the people rallied and finished that stage of the wall--1/2 done, because they had a mind to work. Application: When you are getting close to accomplishing the task God has set before you, opposition will rise. It may be in the form of a person or a problem. It might be financial or medical. It may be something that affects the whole team, or a personal issue. But obstacles are not evidence that wrong has been done. Sometimes they are a blockbuster sign that something right is happening. The enemy will leverage whatever tools at his disposal to slow down God's work. I need to take seriously Nehemiah's example of praying, and getting back to work. I probably tend to focus on all the wall-building aspects in my life, and not remember that projects need prayer. Prayer: God, I thank you for the wall building you let me do. Please guard these walls and build them up for your people and your glory. May my heart turn again and again to you, and may I keep at the work, that I might see you finish the wall.